September 14, 2015


Well, here it is. Cycle day 1. I was starting to get nervous this morning because I hadn't started bleeding, I had zero cramping or bloating, and it was day 14 post ovulation. But Aunt Flow arrived right on time and as I was leaving the Children's Hospital (volunteering, don't worry!) I noticed that it started.

So far it's been a medium-ish flow and it hasn't been as painful as last cycle but there's still quite a bit of cramping going on. But I'm pleased that it's here. I called Dr. T's office immediately and got my sonohystogram set up for next Monday, cd 8. He had one appointment on Monday and I scooped it up since it's my day off. Win!

So now we wait again. I'm so anxious and ready to get going. Poor E has dealt with me talking almost non-stop about "when we get pregnant". Poor guy!

We have a couple of things to look forward to, though, that are completely unrelated to trying to conceive. E has a work trip to Columbus at the end of the month and I decided to join him because two of my best friends from college live there. Woohoo! AND we'll be going to visit his parents in Finland (they're there for about a year for his dad's job) and traveling around a bit.

I'll update next week!

August 26, 2015

A Little Good News

Since nothing can seem to go the way it should and since I freak out about everything nowadays, I thought we had another setback.

Since surgery, I had the wonky cycle (which I'm assuming was just anovulatory) and on top of that, each period has been extremely light. My most recent period was much shorter and much lighter than the others and I got nervous. My mind immediately started racing and I knew we were doomed because I must have scarring.

I called my doctor last Monday and still had no reply on Thursday. I assumed that it was a sign that I needed to move onto a specialist to find out for sure, so I made an appointment with Dr. T. at a highly regarded fertility center.

On Friday I finally got a response from my OB. She felt that the chances of me having scarring were slim and that my body is probably still working out all of the hormones. She also said it would be reasonable to do a hysteroscopy if I wanted or I could be referred to a specialist if I preferred that. Since I already had the appointment with the specialist I decided to keep that appointment.

Yesterday was my appointment and I was very pleased with the specialist. I told E that I was starting to get annoyed because I didn't get called back until 2:00, thirty minutes after my appointment, but after he spent 45 minutes discussing things with me, my annoyance was gone.

We went through my history and testing and he was very impressed with everything that my doctor had done. He recommended that I up my folate to 4mg/day and a couple of other supplements for the MTHFR. These were steps that I was already considering, so it was nice to be told to do it.

When it comes down to my shorter and lighter periods, he also thinks it's more than likely my body regulating. Although Dr. M. suggested the same, it was nice to have a specialist confirm her thoughts. He reminded me that I was on birth control for nearly two months straight, then estrogen, and progesterone. My body has been through a lot. He also said its possible that since the shape of my uterus is technically different, my period could just be different, too. When it comes to scarring, he said considering I had the catheter, the chances of my having any scarring are incredibly slim and it's something that he's never seen in all of his years of practicing. Again, it was nice to have Dr. M's thoughts seconded.

He did an ultrasound and found that my uterine lining was 7.4mm on cd10, which is good considering I'm nowhere near ovulating yet and they like to see the lining around 8mm at the time of ovulation. Dr. T put my mind at ease when he said if I had scarring I probably wouldn't have much lining building up, let alone 7.4 mm. He thought that everything looked great at this point.

He recommended that we do a sonohystogram next cycle to completely rule out scarring mostly just for my peace of mind. He also suggested egg quality testing as well as egg count, but I don't think I'll do that because I don't really believe it's necessary at this point.

What it comes down to is this: both Dr. M. and Dr. T. believe that I don't have scarring but Dr. T. wants to put me at ease so we'll do a sonohystogram next cycle. We can try this cycle if we want.

As always, our fingers are crossed tightly!

July 22, 2015

More Bloodwork

I heard back from one of the nurses today.

They want me to use ovulation tests starting at cycle day 10 and continue with then until I get a positive. Then, they want me to come in on cycle day 21 to check my progesterone levels to confirm that ovulation has occurred. She reminded me that a 12-14 day luteal phase is optimal for conception. I explained again how I came to the conclusion that mine wa so my 5 days last cycle and then asked  if I should wait and see if I self-regulate this cycle and wait until the next. Her response was that Dr. M. wants me to take care of it this cycle so if there is an issue, we can take care of it sooner rather than later.


It makes me nervous. We had NO issues whatsoever getting pregnant before my resection. No, we haven't had issues post-surgery because we haven't tried yet, but in terrified of it becoming a reality. Fingers crossed everything just magically works itself out!

July 19, 2015

I Jinxed Myself.

Apparently I should've stayed away from this little blog because I completely jinxed myself.

Friday night, around 7pm, I went to use the restroom and much to my utter shock there was blood. Not just a little either. It was clear that I was beginning a light flow.

I walked out and just stared at E. He gave me that look of, "What happened, now??" and I told him. He obviously didn't understand until I explained that it was way, way too early. And I only had a 5 day luteal phase (again, much explanation was needed).

Now here's where my concern was coming from:

  1. Pre-surgery, my cycles ranged from 30-32 days and never any shorter or longer (unless pregnant). This was only a 25 cycle, and honestly, I could handle that.
  2. BUT, pre-surgery my luteal phase was ALWAYS 13 days (again, unless pregnant). In all of the months that I temped and used OPKs, it never strayed from 13 days. According to Fertility Friend, I only had a 5 DAY LUTEAL PHASE. Alarms went off and panic set in. I certainly know what a luteal phase that short means.
  3. I tried to calm myself and remind myself that my body has been through a lot in the past few months, so maybe that's why and it's just a wonky cycle. But then I committed a cardinal sin - I checked out Google. It seemed as though every story I came across, the women were lucky enough to have cycles identical to how they were pre-surgery. Commence total freak out.
Luckily, I've calmed down a bit and have mostly convinced myself that it's probably just a really, really weird cycle and everything will go back to normal. But I'm still calling Dr. M. tomorrow just to chat and express my fears of Asherman's Syndrome.

And with that, I think it's clear that we will not be trying for a baby this month.

Nothing. Ever. Goes. Smoothly.

July 17, 2015

Life Lately

Wow. I can't believe it's been two whole months since I last wrote. To be honest, I haven't had much to say. But let's back up. First recovery:

My recovery went really well once the constipation issue was resolved. All my anxiety about having the catheter removed was for nothing! It was seriously the easiest thing ever. I told Dr. M that I was really nervous and anxious and she told me it would take two seconds. It wasn't painful AT ALL. There was a bit of pressure and then it was done. Fantastic! I did have to go on antibiotics for a week because my laparoscopic incision was slightly infected. No biggie.

Then six weeks later I went back for my follow up, follow up appointment. I was nervous because I started to spot and lightly bleed while still using the estrogen patches so she had me start the progesterone early. Well it was 5 or so days after stopping the progesterone that I had my appointment. I expressed my concerns about not having a bleed after stopping it and she said to give it another week. If I still didn't start, we would do 10 more days of the Provera.

On my way out, I asked for a copy of my records and the receptionist told me to take a seat as it would only take about 5 minutes. I told her it would be a fairly large file to which she responded, "That's what everyone says! Don't worry; it will only take a few minutes". Ok. So I sat. I waited and waited. And then I realized MY PERIOD JUST STARTED!! I've seriously never been so happy to have a period. It was like the receptionist knew, too! Right at that moment she brought out my file. She chuckled and told me I was right, it was pretty big.

One year's worth of medical records and heartache. RIDICULOUS.

I also stopped to chat with Ellen. She made me promise that if we move before having a baby that we send pictures. She also told me that I can email her whenever I have questions, even if I'm no longer their patient. Nice!

Other than that, life has been fairly quiet lately. E and I went back to Michigan & Illinois last week and had a great time. We got to go up to the lake in Michigan and spend a couple of days with my parents. Then we went to visit with his parents in Illinois. We also decided that we're going to make a trip to visit them in Finland happen. I don't remember if I've mentioned it here, but his dad was sent to Finland for a year-ish and his mom is joining him for part of the time. So now it's time to save, save, save and then blow it all traveling :)

I'm really ready to start trying to conceive again and am having an inner dilemma about it. Dr. M said to wait 2-3 regular cycles. That looks like this:
  • Provera bleed- June 22nd
  • Regular Cycle 1- July 26ish
  • Regular Cycle 2- August 28ish
  • Regular Cycle 3- September 30ish
That's an exceptionally long time to have to wait still. I know I can't do that. I've done some research and even found a practice that says you can start trying after your first Aunt Flow shows. I just don't know what to do. I don't want to rush things but at the same time I know I can't wait until October to start trying again. I think I'm going to wait and see how my next period is and go from there. If it's back to how it normally was, I think it's safe to say that my lining is similar to what it was pre-surgery and we'll probably start trying the next cycle. If it's not, then I know we'll have to wait longer.

I've never wanted time to pass quickly as much as I do now!

May 17, 2015

The Awkwardness of Recovery

Fair warning: I'm not holding back on this post and there will definitely be TMI. I kindly ask you to pass along if you don't want to read it.

Overall the recovery has been pretty easier than I expected. Not much bleeding at all, whoop!

My biggest issue has been constipation. Between the anesthesia, pain medication, and poor food choices (I may have eaten a burger Tuesday night, Chinese food Wednesday night, and ICE CREAM!!! last night...whoops) I've been in a lot of pain. Thankfully I had some relief today but I am still cramping a lot and have had back pain.

I've had some major anxiety about the catheter. I'm sure it's really not that big of a deal to have it, but I'm terrified of accidentally removing it. I kind of got over my fear of accidentally pulling it out while sleeping after the second night. BUT, I've had a (probably) irrational fear that while dealing with the constipation, I'd accidentally force it out. It didn't help that the visible tubing between my upper thigh and where it inserts into my body is a bit longer and looser now. Fingers crossed I didn't screw it up somehow!

My teeny tiny abdominal incision from the laparoscopy has been a bit more troublesome than anticipated. I had a laparoscopy in high school, so the incision is right along the previous incision. I was really sore Thursday and Friday and E had to help me out of bed whenever I needed to use the restroom. Thankfully by Saturday, it was starting to get better and I was managing to get out of bed on my own. Today it's significantly better.

Tomorrow I go to have the catheter removed and that brings on a whole different anxiety. I'm scared. E is planning to go back to work (of course) but we're not sure how I'm going to feel afterward so he's trying to decide if he should take a half day off. I'm going to call in the morning to find out their advice. I'm probably just being a baby.

E is seriously the BEST husband on the planet. I knew that before this weekend, but he absolutely solidified that belief. He helped me out of bed, made me food, ran to the store multiple times, got me water, cleaned the house, got the oil changed in both of our cars, took care of the little puppy, and so much more. He's great!

May 14, 2015

Good News All Around!

I'm so glad that I trusted Dr. M. As we got closer to surgery date I was secretly starting to have some doubts if the surgery was worth the money. After meeting with her on Monday I was seriously starting to doubt if we should go through with it. The images should have shown something, right? Thankfully I stuck with it!

I had a 3cm septum that was successfully (we believe, at least!) resected yesterday. I don't remember much of what Dr. M told me so this is all based on what E remembers. Let's hope he's right ;)

From my understanding, the surgery was on the longer end but they got great pictures (E was sure to let me know that he got to see the inside of my uterus...strange indeed!), they had to do the laparoscopy and they did resect the septum. E tried to explain what he saw in the pictures and it sounds like my uterus was a pinkish color (it looked like "meat" apparently...gross) whereas the septum was white in color which indicated that it wasn't getting blood or nutrient flow. He said that the after pictures showed the white gone and only a healthy looking uterus. Let's hope this did it for us!

I was in recovery for a while because I was in quite a bit of pain and was really nauseous. The recovery nurse was wonderful and I wish I remembered her name because I would love to send her a thank you card! Dr. M. came to speak with me and all I got out of that conversation was that there was a septum and they fixed it. The rest of the time the nurse had to deal with me crying and saying "I'm so thankful" over and over. She was a saint.

We got home around 4/4:30, I believe, and my sister stopped by quickly to drop off some flowers and a gift from her, my parents, and grandma. My nephew picked out the card and it is certainly a two-year old card. So cute!

Then I was pretty much off in la la land the rest of the night and slept. I woke up around 2am and was in and out until 5:30 when I woke E up. He got me a small breakfast and I took some more pain meds. Then it was back to sleep!

I'm actually feeling pretty well now. I'm trying to walk around a bit to hopefully keep the gas pains to a minimum and I haven't taken any pain medication since this morning. The most uncomfortable and awkward part is the catheter. It's not a traditional urine catheter, of course, so its strange to use the restroom. It just doesn't feel right. I feel bad because E has, once again, gotten quite an education with this surgery. He's such a good guy and I'm incredibly lucky to have him!

Right now, all of this uncomfortableness from the catheter and the slight pain is totally worth it and I truly am thankful. While it's going to be a while before we can start trying to conceive again, I'm glad that we're finally moving forward and may have finally found a solution.